Mentoring, the second best form of education

I woulnd't even be on this blog if it wasnt for the mentoring of an old friend of mine, W.W.
This friend guided me through the process of establishing this blog, so I think this blog should spring from a conversation that we had earlier in the day, an example of which has led me to the subject here, mentoring.

We have many ways of learning, and much to learn about how to learn. I am not going to delve into the huge variety of ways we learn, but specifically expand upon what I think to be the second most effective, mentoring. The most effective learning technique is experience, the second is mentoring, the third is directed self-education, and the fourth is up for grabs. It could be necessity, coercion, formal education, imprinting, modeling, peer pressure, belief-immersions, or many other learning techniques.

I believe that old saying, "experience is the best teacher". I don't think a valid argument can be made against this. For example, look how detached a general populace is from a far-away war, or from a homeless person on the street. But get that person shot on a battlefield, and they are going to learn about wounds. Or have an office manager one day recognize that the huddled person on the street corner is the beloved mother of a childhood friend, and watch the helping hand extend. In both cases, experience has made one care, made one learn about something, because it is personal.

Mentoring is also personal, but it is proactive, instead of reactive, as experience is. Mentoring is a personally guided tour into learning. Its effectiveness depends on an inborn concern for another to progress, and so is based on selflessness, more than personal gain. Students rely more on this than on expertise, as they cannot recognize expertise as easily as they can friendship or caring. For this reason, mentoring is often ephemeral, as mentors are rarely available for extensive learning situations, except occasionally in the rare combination of broad specific mentor expertise with strong bonds based on trust. In such cases, mentoring is not the primary relationship, friendship is. Mentoring is only an occasional, if at all, occurence in these instances. Friendship does not depend on it. It is a gift when mentoring occurs in friendship, it is not a required characteistic.

In summary, experience is the best teacher, and mentoring the second best. To discover a mentor, be a friend. Mentoring works both ways, and occurs because of benificence, not demand.